This is more of a personal post, so if you’re interested in reading about my embarrassing high school days…boy, you are in for a treat!
This post is inspired by my upcoming 10-Year High School Reunion, which I will not be attending.
The number one reason is because it’s $130+ per person, and while that’s not outrageous, I’d rather put that money toward a Disney vacation. Or a fancy dinner with just my husband and I. Or a new vacuum cleaner (we need one). Or, I don’t know…literally anything else on the planet.
I don’t want to offend anyone who is going, or who worked hard to put together the event. I know a lot of people really loved high school and are dying to see old friends, dress up on a fancy yacht, and get buzzed, while a poor middle schooler watches their kids at home (kidding, don’t come after me!).
I get really nervous at the thought of even replying “no” on the High School Reunion Facebook page, because I hate the thought of anyone, even people I never talk to, getting mad at me. Hence, this blog post.
Back in high school, I had my small group of friends, and didn’t fit in with anyone else. I wasn’t a “tough kid,” a “tomboy,” or a “cool girl.” The friendly gays, who loved everyone, didn’t even like me (though, I hope if they met me now, they would kind of like me). Those few close friends- I still talk to as of this day, and we don’t need a pricey reunion as an excuse to get together.
I was lucky in that I had friends at all. Of course, back in the early years of high school (9th and 10th grade), we’d have these petty, tri-monthly fights where one person would inexplicably get left out of the gang for a week. Luckily, these “fights” always wore off (we were just kids), and ended altogether once we inched toward senior year.
Did I mention I was somehow our class treasurer, and was on the prom planning committee? I still have no idea how that happened. I can’t even count properly while playing Monopoly.
Speaking of prom, I had a crush on this one guy, and we ended up going together as friends. He happened to have a crush on another (way cuter) girl, and stared longingly at her the whole night. However, we had some good conversations. I remember he once told me “I had funny observations” about people. That was my first hint that I should really be a writer. I mainly wanted a date so that I could take nice pictures, and so my grandkids wouldn’t think I was a loser.
Now, I really wish I had just gone solo (no offence, past prom date. I hope you’re living a good life). If only my future husband had gone to my school…
A few embarrassing moments stand out. One was during 10th grade I think, and it just so happened that NONE of my friends were in the same lunch period as I was. I had no one to sit with that whole semester, until lunch hours changed schedules. I remember spending my time pretending to stand in different food lines, “changing” my mind about my order at the last minute and going to a different line, just to make the 30 minutes go by faster.
Once, I mustered up the courage to ask this one girl (damn you, Stephanie R.) if I could eat with her and her friends, and she looked at me like I was the biggest loser on the planet. Which I can’t really argue with, and I’m sure she’s changed since then, but man. I never want to go through that experience again.
Another was when I agreed to help a group of friends with a class presentation. I played the music for them, and thought I was pausing and re-starting the music at the appropriate times. It turns out, all I had to do was just turn on the CD and let the music play without interruption. I TOTALLY messed up their whole group presentation, and I actually made one of my friends cry. Without my help, their presentation would have been awesome. I still feel bad about it to this day, and I remember this chick Ana muttering to me afterwards (“all you had to do was press play.”). Oops.
Oh, and in between 8th and 9th grade I had a super growth spurt in the chest region of my body. When I returned to school in Freshman year, everyone thought they were allowed to ask if I had a boob job. Yeah, because my parents totally allowed me to get plastic surgery at 14.
I guess what I’m trying to say during this whole tangent is that high school wasn’t my favorite time. I often felt lonely and awkward and anxious. I’d go home after an argument with my friends and write down everything I might have done to make them mad, and then my brain would be so frazzled I would have to take a nap.
I would enter rooms with my head down, and I apologized for absolutely everything (“Can I have a pencil, maybe, please? No? Okay, that’s totally fine, no problem! Sorry for bothering you!”). I would have apologized for my very existence if I could.
Not all days were bad. I lived for hanging out with my friends after school, life got better when my friends got into the same lunch period I did (I hate block scheduling), and Grad Nite at Disney was the bomb. As long as my friends were by my side, I had a blast. I still do.
However, I can’t imagine being stuck on a boat, with alcohol (which I don’t drink, because it gives me migraines), with people who probably wouldn’t sit next to me anyway (if they didn’t then, why would they now?).
I do hope everyone that goes has fun, but I know that I won’t be missed. I give props to the organizers of the event, but in all honesty, I’d rather stay home reading (because damn it, I’m an adult, and I can stay home and be anti-social if I want).
Thanks for reading this non-Disney personal post. I hope some other high school outcasts can relate.
Would you go to your 10-year High School Reunion? Would you say you invented Post-Its if you did?
Hugs and Fishes,